Decision Resources, Inc. / Workshops

LINKS

www.gratefulness.org An inspiring site filled with opportunities to open your heart and live life more fully. Anyone facing a difficult decision or involved in a challenging conflict can gain strength and perspective by reflecting upon gratefulness.

www.ted.com Challenge your perspective with video talks by leading-edge thinkers and doers in technology, entertainment, and design. Start with a talk by Dr. Jill Boltye Taylor on our fundamental nature as humans.

www.thirdside.org William Ury wrote a book about conflict and its transformation called The Third Side. This site offers many resources to get you started if you’re stuck.

www.4gateways.com This is the coaching method I have been trained in by the creator, Dr.Tom Daly. It offers a detailed view of the 4 Gateways approach, beliefs underlying the model, and other resources.

BOOKS

Self Mastery

"The Fifth Discipline Fieldbook"
Peter Senge et al., Currency-Doubleday, 1994
Develops the related concept of “mental models” and how they influence the way people see the world. pp. 235-246. Effectiveness in conflict situations to bring people into dialogue requires an understanding of “where everyone is coming from.”

"The Reflective Practitioner: How Professionals Think in Action"
Donald A. Schon, Basic Books, 1983
A leading social scientist and consultant examines five professions__ engineering, architecture, management, psychotherapy and town planning__ to show how professionals really go about solving problems. Offers a way of understanding mastery.

"Thinking Body, Dancing Mind: Extraordinary Performance in Athletics, Business, and Life" Chungliang Al Huang and Jerry Lynch, Bantam, 1992
A martial arts master and a sports psychologist offer strategies and mental exercises to manage our internal state of being for optimal performance.

"Journey to Center: Lessons in Unifying Body, Mind, and Spirit"
Thomas Crum Simon and Schuster, 1997
A veteran aikido teacher and performance coach offers exercises to increase your ability to focus and
act with power in your work, relationships, and leisure pursuits.

Communication

"Communication When I Say No, I Feel Guilty"
Manuel Smith, Ph.D., Bantam, 1975
One of the first and clearest on the theory and practice of assertiveness skills for daily life.

"Communicating At Work"
Tony Alessandra, Ph.D. and Phil Hunsaker, Ph.D. Fireside, 1993.
A good general work on communication. The sections on active listening and questioning skills
(pp. 54-78) are quite good.

"Leadership Effectiveness Training"
Dr. Thomas Gordon, Bantam, 1977
Clear, specific information on listening and conflict resolution skills, particularly chapters IV and VIII.

"Tongue Fu!: How to Deflect, Disarm, and Defuse Any Verbal Conflict"
Sam Horn, St. Martin’s Press, 1996 Playfully uses a martial arts metaphor to explore the skillful
use of language for the conflicts of everyday life. The author provides many examples and gives
specific language suggestions.

"Metaphors We Live By"
George Lakoff and Mark Johnson, University of Chicago, 1980
Seminal work on the structure and significance of metaphor in our lives. Metaphors serve as frames. Identifying and using metaphors skillfully helps you reframe.

Conciliation

"The Crossroads of Conflict: A Journey into the Heart of Dispute Resolution"
Ken Cloke, Janis, 2006
A brilliant book that represents the leading edge of knowledge about the practice of conflict transformation by a veteran practitioner and teacher.

"People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts"
Robert Bolton, Ph.D., Touchstone-Simon & Schuster, 1979
A good overview that combines communication and conflict resolution. The chapter on the emotional dynamics of conflict is very good.

"Negotiation: Strategies for Mutual Gain"
Lavinia Hall, editor, Sage, 1993
From the basic seminar of the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School. Chapter 9, Conflict From a Psychological Perspective is an excellent overview of the dynamics of
conflict forces with which mediators must work.

"The Way of Conflict: Elemental Wisdom for Resolving Disputes and
Transcending Differences"
Deidre Combs, New World Library, 2004
A mediator and facilitator uses the basic elements (earth, air, fire, water) to consider conflict and
skillful means in working with it.

"The Heart of Conflict"
Brian Muldoon, Putnam, 1996
A veteran mediator looks at the dimensions of conflict including issues such as emotion, passion,
identity and healing.

"The Healing Wisdom of Africa"
Malidoma Some, Jeremy Tarcher/Putnam, 1998
The nature of ritual and how indigenous people use elemental forces for healing.

"The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace"
Jack Kornfield, Bantam Books, 2002
Contains meditations, beautiful stories, and inspiring quotes about the deeper spiritual themes
mentioned in the title.

"Worldwords: Global Reflections to Awaken the Spirit"
Victor LaCerva, HEAL, 1999
Contains inspiring words from many cultures, including practices for decision-making and conflict resolution. (available directly from the author at heartsongs@earthlink.net).

Mediation, Negotiation, and Decision-Making

"How to Make Meetings Work"
Michael Doyle and David Straus, Jove, 1976
The "classic" work on facilitation. A "must-read" for anyone who facilitates meetings. Covers roles in meetings, dealing with problem participants, and suggests formats and tools to enhance meeting effectiveness.

"Facilitator’s Guide to Participatory Decision-Making"
Sam Kaner, New Society Publishers, 1996
An excellent primer for working with groups. It covers conflict issues well and is filled with group techniques for decision-making.

"A Field Guide to Good Decisions: Values in Action"
Mark Bennett and Joan McIver Gibson, Praeger, 2006
This book goes deeply into the nature of conversation about values which can guide thoughtful,
durable decisions.

"The Art of Mediation, Second Edition"
Mark D. Bennett and Scott Hughes, NITA, 2005
A standard text covering all aspects of the mediation process with substantial resource materials for
all types of mediation.




						LINKS www.gratefulness.org An inspiring site filled with opportunities to open your heart and live life more fully. Anyone facing a difficult decision or involved in a challenging conflict can gain strength and perspective by reflecting upon gratefulness. www.ted.com Challenge your perspective with video talks by leading-edge thinkers and doers in technology, entertainment, and design. Start with a talk by Dr. Jill Boltye Taylor on our fundamental nature as humans. www.thirdside.org William Ury wrote a book about conflict and its transformation called The Third Side. This site offers many resources to get you started if you’re stuck. www.4gateways.com This is the coaching method I have been trained in by the creator, Dr.Tom Daly. It offers a detailed view of the 4 Gateways approach, beliefs underlying the model, and other resources. BOOKS Self Mastery "The Fifth Discipline Fieldbook" Peter Senge et al., Currency-Doubleday, 1994 Develops the related concept of “mental models” and how they influence the way people see the world. pp. 235-246. Effectiveness in conflict situations to bring people into dialogue requires an understanding of “where everyone is coming from.” "The Reflective Practitioner: How Professionals Think in Action" Donald A. Schon, Basic Books, 1983 A leading social scientist and consultant examines five professions__ engineering, architecture, management, psychotherapy and town planning__ to show how professionals really go about solving problems. Offers a way of understanding mastery. "Thinking Body, Dancing Mind: Extraordinary Performance in Athletics, Business, and Life" Chungliang Al Huang and Jerry Lynch, Bantam, 1992 A martial arts master and a sports psychologist offer strategies and mental exercises to manage our internal state of being for optimal performance. "Journey to Center: Lessons in Unifying Body, Mind, and Spirit" Thomas Crum Simon and Schuster, 1997 A veteran aikido teacher and performance coach offers exercises to increase your ability to focus and act with power in your work, relationships, and leisure pursuits. Communication "Communication When I Say No, I Feel Guilty" Manuel Smith, Ph.D., Bantam, 1975 One of the first and clearest on the theory and practice of assertiveness skills for daily life. "Communicating At Work" Tony Alessandra, Ph.D. and Phil Hunsaker, Ph.D. Fireside, 1993. A good general work on communication. The sections on active listening and questioning skills (pp. 54-78) are quite good. "Leadership Effectiveness Training" Dr. Thomas Gordon, Bantam, 1977 Clear, specific information on listening and conflict resolution skills, particularly chapters IV and VIII. "Tongue Fu!: How to Deflect, Disarm, and Defuse Any Verbal Conflict" Sam Horn, St. Martin’s Press, 1996 Playfully uses a martial arts metaphor to explore the skillful use of language for the conflicts of everyday life. The author provides many examples and gives specific language suggestions. "Metaphors We Live By" George Lakoff and Mark Johnson, University of Chicago, 1980 Seminal work on the structure and significance of metaphor in our lives. Metaphors serve as frames. Identifying and using metaphors skillfully helps you reframe. Conciliation "The Crossroads of Conflict: A Journey into the Heart of Dispute Resolution" Ken Cloke, Janis, 2006 A brilliant book that represents the leading edge of knowledge about the practice of conflict transformation by a veteran practitioner and teacher. "People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts" Robert Bolton, Ph.D., Touchstone-Simon & Schuster, 1979 A good overview that combines communication and conflict resolution. The chapter on the emotional dynamics of conflict is very good. "Negotiation: Strategies for Mutual Gain" Lavinia Hall, editor, Sage, 1993 From the basic seminar of the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School. Chapter 9, Conflict From a Psychological Perspective is an excellent overview of the dynamics of conflict forces with which mediators must work. "The Way of Conflict: Elemental Wisdom for Resolving Disputes and Transcending Differences" Deidre Combs, New World Library, 2004 A mediator and facilitator uses the basic elements (earth, air, fire, water) to consider conflict and skillful means in working with it. "The Heart of Conflict" Brian Muldoon, Putnam, 1996 A veteran mediator looks at the dimensions of conflict including issues such as emotion, passion, identity and healing. "The Healing Wisdom of Africa" Malidoma Some, Jeremy Tarcher/Putnam, 1998 The nature of ritual and how indigenous people use elemental forces for healing. "The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace" Jack Kornfield, Bantam Books, 2002 Contains meditations, beautiful stories, and inspiring quotes about the deeper spiritual themes mentioned in the title. "Worldwords: Global Reflections to Awaken the Spirit" Victor LaCerva, HEAL, 1999 Contains inspiring words from many cultures, including practices for decision-making and conflict resolution. (available directly from the author at heartsongs@earthlink.net). Mediation, Negotiation, and Decision-Making "How to Make Meetings Work" Michael Doyle and David Straus, Jove, 1976 The "classic" work on facilitation. A "must-read" for anyone who facilitates meetings. Covers roles in meetings, dealing with problem participants, and suggests formats and tools to enhance meeting effectiveness. "Facilitator’s Guide to Participatory Decision-Making" Sam Kaner, New Society Publishers, 1996 An excellent primer for working with groups. It covers conflict issues well and is filled with group techniques for decision-making. "A Field Guide to Good Decisions: Values in Action" Mark Bennett and Joan McIver Gibson, Praeger, 2006 This book goes deeply into the nature of conversation about values which can guide thoughtful, durable decisions. "The Art of Mediation, Second Edition" Mark D. Bennett and Scott Hughes, NITA, 2005 A standard text covering all aspects of the mediation process with substantial resource materials for all types of mediation.